Sunday, November 30, 2008
The past few days have been probably one of the worst days of my life.Shifted to my Uncle's place on Fri night itself. Had trouble sleeping since there were 5 of us sharing one room with all the boxes filling up whatever space that is left in the room. The room was so stuffy and hot. All of us were depressed but we were trying to make the best out of the situation.
Things were not getting better on Sat. There were some mild arguments between my dad and my grandfather. Harsh words were exchanged between my sister, me, my mum and dad. I know i have said some harsh things to my mum these past few days out of frustration and i wish i could take it back. Im sorry Ma and i always love u.
My dad screwed me up for staying up awake till 4am,watching tv. I have always been sleeping late in my own house so why cant i stay awake now also? That was when reality hit me hard. Wadever is it, that is not my house and i cannot be the way i was at my own house. Basically, i dont have freedom in that house now because ITS NOT MY HOUSE.
There is no internet in that house.. no SCV.. basically we dont have a life there.. but wad choice do we have? Even though my parents dun say much to my sis and me, i know that they are very upset with the way things are and they are the ones who felt the greatest sense of loss when they handed over the house keys to the new owner.
Right now, all of us are praying so hard for the loan to be approved as soon as possible so that we can buy a house of our own soon.
The only thing that brings joy to my fucked up life right now is being with Raj. These past few days, i have been treasuring every minute that i have been spending with him because when i get home, its back to the square one where i get depressed and stressed all over again. He has been cheering me up, telling me again and again that everything will be ok. He is like my greatest strength right now to continue with life.
**I dont know what i would have done without u Kanagaraj and i just wanted to say that I Love U To Bits and Thanks for everything that you have done for me and have been doing for me so far**.
*I Love U*
9:23 PM
